It was definitely a weird feeling coming back to the PRC this time. After 5 weeks in the US, enjoying how easy life is in a free country where you speak the language and eat normal food, it was difficult to be excited to get on the plane back to this life so foreign from our own. Living here in China, I have gotten use to ignoring the background sounds and kind of living in my own world. When you cannot understand the language and you don't care to hear the sounds of spitting and urination - you learn to block it out. In fact I see many Western people in the shopping areas with their iPods on. I think they have the same feeling as me. Our first full day back in the US at my sister's in Chicago, we took the kids to the zoo. All day I felt like I had been a deaf person who suddenly was able to hear again. I was eavesdropping on every one's conversations and I felt like striking up conversations with every stranger around. Most of you who know me know I am a talker - well when you are riding in a car with a man who speaks no English and you have a woman in your house all day that speaks no English - it is that constant feeling of uncomfortable silence. But yet there is nothing you can do about it. I simply miss talking to people. I think it is the little things like this that I miss the most. Things that make you feel comfortable in your own skin. I kind of feel like I am wearing someone else's skin temporarily and it is not quite as comfortable as mine?
So- flight #1 was to the unknown - nervous, anxious, scared, unsure of what to expect, hoping for the best.
Flight #2 was in sadness - missing my friends and family already, knowing my good neighbors in China were gone, mourning the loss of the good food (I needed this one since I gained 10 pounds in the five weeks home) and finally knowing that my next visit back is a whole year away.
I once again enjoyed my extra large Dunkin Donuts coffee and then we boarded the flight back to the other side of the world.
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